Remember, Dads Are People Too
Going beyond the gift guide…and 3 things to buy him if you must.
Over the past week or so I’ve received numerous emails from PR folks “just checking in”(often again) to see if I was working on a Father’s Day Gift Guide, and if in fact I was, might their clients product “be a good fit for it?” I really need to be better about replying with a request to be removed from whatever list I am on at some of these firms. The crap I’m pitched, you wouldn’t believe.
They weren’t off the mark with the inquiry though. Indeed at one point I had considered putting something of a list together, but ultimately thought the better of it. There are numerous quality guides already out there, for example Michael Williams always puts together a thoughtful collection of items on A Continuous Lean and if you wish to go the mainstream route, Gear Patrol has no shortage of suggestions “for every kind of dad.” Every kind of dad. For whatever reason that really got me thinking. Not so much about the categories that we all try to fit dads into, but the multitudes contained within the person.
We’re still pitched these archetypes “sporty dad”, “nerdy dad”, “artsy dad”, “mechanically inclined dad”, “dad who cooks”, “dad who fancies himself a renaissance man”, and my personal favorite “dad who has everything.” Beware anyone or any entity that claims to definitively know what to get for “the man who has everything.” Whatever “it” is, it ain’t it. Instead of viewing your dad through any of the aforementioned lenses, widen your gaze and try to see the whole picture. Go beyond the satisfactory gift for dad, find the man and see what he could use. I wasn’t really able to do this until I turned 31, the age my dad was when I was born. Up to that point he was first and foremost a parent to me and my two sisters. Sure, he had interests of his own but they existed only as subplots in the story of him being a father. Since the realization that I’d hit the age he was when I came along, and subsequently the age when one sister arrived (I’m nearly there with respect to the other) the way I view my dad has changed dramatically.
I know this may come as a shock to some of you, but dads are people too, men in fact. Men who had hopes, dreams and desires before you came along, still have them now too. They do not solely exist to put a roof over your head, teach you how to repair a car, practice your sport of choice, or stand by the grill in stoic silence. They may not have even done any of those things for you. I know plenty of amazing dads who aren’t the primary earners, who couldn’t point out a spark plug (let alone change one) who have no athletic talent and who prefer to chat with a glass of chilled red wine in hand whilst waiting on food to be delivered rather than slap some meat on a grill and drink a six pack. Point is, there’s no singular way to be a father because time doesn’t stand still while you’re being parented. We are all works in progress, even your dad. If you really want to give him something special this Father’s Day, give him your time, a little more than usual. A phone call will suffice, video chat if he’s so inclined. Nothing beats being there in person, but I know all too well that’s not always possible. Don’t talk his ear off about everything you’ve got going on. Get through whatever usual banter you have, let those awkward silences play out. Then, when it’s usually about time to say “well I’ve got some stuff to get back to”, hit him with some questions, you know, the ones you always mean to ask but somehow keep forgetting to. Dig a little, hell, dig a-lot if you’re comfortable. I guarantee you there’ll be a surprise in there somewhere, something that drives home the humanity that’s often missing in our societal portrayal of “the typical dad.” It’ll likely be a bit uncomfortable at times for the both of you, but it’ll have been worth it for the gift that is a good conversation with the man responsible for no less than your very existence.
And, if after all of that you’re still inclined to give the guy something tangible to mark the day, here are 3 things I don’t think any man would mind receiving from their kid.
The Grand Gift- Rolex Oyster Perpetual
Independent online reseller 25Dials consistently has a great selection of vintage and neo-vintage watches, mostly Rolexes. This 1959 Rolex “6564” is as classic as it gets with a porcelain white dial that’s taken on a nice beige color over time. Sized at 34mm and on a brown suede strap it’s a tasteful choice for a dad of any age and of any style archetype.
The Big Gift- Double RL Overdale Indigo Denim Trucker Jacket
Every man should have a great denim jacket. This is the best fitting, best feeling interpretation of the American classic that I’ve come across. Diamonds are a girl’s best friend, denim is a man’s.
The Gift That Keeps On Giving- Spotify Premium
Whether your dad is a music lover, devoured of books-on-tape or podcast consumer, he shouldn’t have to listen to ads when enjoying any of the above. Get him his own premium account or setup Spotify Duo so that you can both enjoy ad free listening. The added bonus here is when you send him things to listen to, now he has no excuse not to check them out. Keep in mind however, that cuts both ways.
Bonus - Porsche Experience Center Atlanta & Los Angeles
Okay, to be fair this one requires quite a bit of advance planning, but it’s well worth the effort and expense. Even if your dad isn’t “a car guy” I’d bet you he’ll give it a go and surprise even himself. On top of the singularly great experience behind the wheel of some of Porsche’s best vehicles, the food is good and the memories you make will be unforgettable.